On the wall above my fireplace, I have a beautiful saying painted. It says "Make time for the quiet moments, because God whispers and the world is loud." I often try to consider this as I feel consumed by the chaos that tends to surround me. Oddly enough, today, I feel as though God was shouting. At first, from afar through the words of a new, dear friend... but then through a megaphone directly in my ear. It caused a resounding shout of praise in my heart - and suddenly it seems as though this is what I've been waiting for all along.
Let me start at the beginning.
I had the opportunity today to talk to one of the most extraordinary people I know. Her grace is palpable. Her sincerity is exceptional. Her inner beauty shines a blindingly bright light. She listens to the nudges of her heart even if they whisper .. and did I mention she is incredibly inspiring? She spoke truths to me in a way that my heart understood. She did this selflessly and with a dollop of affection for good measure. My heart heard her heart and found a spark of hope... a spark that has now been fanned into a flame because of what happened next.
On my ride home, I turned on the radio and heard a song I had never heard before. The lyrics said: "Can't spend my whole life wasting everything I know I've been given...'Cause you've made me for so much more than sittin' on the side lines...I don't wanna look back and wonder if good enough could've been better...Everyday's a day to start over...So, why am I waiting for tomorrow?"
My heart exploded with the pure joy of answered prayer. Right then and there, God revealed to me that this conversation was the primer for me. If you heard the conversation we had, you would know that this song was the validation I needed. I swear, God had this song play at precisely THIS moment to let me know He was with me...and I am confident He was with her, too - guiding and prompting and nudging her to say exactly what was said even though some of it was hard for me to swallow.
When I got home, I came across a scripture in Lamentations. For the record, I use the word 'lament' often - when I need to make an emphatic point about something emotional. This scripture said "Because of the Lord's great love we are not consumed, for His compassions never fail" 3:22. If you were part of our conversation today, you would know we talked about feeling consumed by feelings - feeling obsessive over things we shouldn't obsess about...but God, our God, revealed to me that I need to place my consumption in HIM, not in these trivial thoughts. He showed me I don't HAVE to be consumed because of His love...He will continue to show me mercy - a mercy that is sometimes hard for me to accept. A mercy that came by way of a conversation of truths today.
AND then - as if God wasn't shouting loud enough - He decides to remind me of other parts of our conversation. I saw this from my dear, dear friend "...you are you not meant for crawling, so don't. You have wings. Learn to use them and fly. You were born with potential. You were born with goodness and trust. You were born with greatness. You were born with wings." All I could think was 'we talked about this' - not in these words, but her inspiration to me MEANT what these words say (if that even makes sense...). Her words were different. My heart understood them in the same way as my heart understands these.
So I can say.. with certainty.. that sometimes when God speaks, He shouts. When it's this obvious, the easy part is hearing Him. The hard part is trusting Him.
Heavenly Father, thank You for the spark. It seemed that for so long I was trying to rub two sticks together on a stone to try and find one...turns out you had someone with a match who wanted to share. I am grateful. Your goodness shines in the darkest places and sometimes I'd rather cover my eyes than see. I thank You for the answer. I thank You for the unexpected light that blazed through our conversation of truths today. I thank You for the wisdom and guidance You placed in her heart - and I thank You for the courage you gave her to share them with me. Lord, I had climbed my watchtower and was waiting to see what answer you would give to my complaint. I know what You planned does not happen right away. At times, You move slowly, steadily, surely, and You let things come to pass. Nothing You do is overdue a single day (Habakkuk 2:1,3). Today was the day I needed what You gave me. My hope is in You, God. Though I will fail, I am thankful Your compassion is new. Help me remember today so that I can walk the path before me with my head held high and in Your blessed assurance. *Amen*
"If God changes your heart, be willing to change your plans!"
~ Joyce Meyer.