Monday, December 17, 2012

Isaiah 55:8-13

Jesus, come quickly.

Never in my life have I ever said those words. Normally, I say Jesus give me more time – more time to love, more time to share, more time to shine my light, more of You…Jesus tells us that for everything, there is a season. Jesus tells us that the time is now to find Him. Jesus tells us that we are salt and light. Jesus tells us that we should be a light unto the world. Jesus tells us that he wants NONE to perish – but all to have everlasting life. For me. For now. Jesus come. How can our hearts carry this burden? How can our hearts carry this fear of uncertainty? Jesus tells us He will restore us...but Jesus, come now and come quickly because the time between now and our restoration in You seems a million lifetimes away.

“Seek the Lord while he may be found;
call on him while he is near.
7 Let the wicked forsake their ways
and the unrighteous their thoughts.
Let them turn to the Lord, and he will have mercy on them,
and to our God, for he will freely pardon.”

Jesus tells me in the space between awake and asleep that I was made for times as these. He tells me to let Him in. He tells me to surrender. And while I would love to say He always wins, He doesn’t. And while I would love to say that I am always obedient, I’m not. He tells me to have faith – to TRUST Him – wholly, entirely, selfishly even – because that type of love gives way to His. That type of love makes His ways, my ways; makes His command to go out and speak Truth, my ability. Such a place as this is hard – but we need it for times such as these. We are the sowers, the spreaders, the shepherds, the seed… but most of all we are the sheep ourselves. We are to follow our one master and not stray. We are to TRUST Him – that his ways are above our ways, that his thoughts above our thoughts … because the only way to make it through times as these is to believe that. The only way to make it through times as these is to TRUST that His purpose prevails and while our hearts feel as though they may shatter, the truth is that He stands beside us guiding every tear to water a perfect fruit of our sadness… a perfect fruit - ripe for His picking and His glory.
8 “For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
neither are your ways my ways,”
declares the Lord.
9 “As the heavens are higher than the earth,
so are my ways higher than your ways
and my thoughts than your thoughts.
10 As the rain and the snow
come down from heaven,
and do not return to it
without watering the earth
and making it bud and flourish,
so that it yields seed for the sower and bread for the eater,
11 so is my word that goes out from my mouth:
It will not return to me empty,
but will accomplish what I desire
and achieve the purpose for which I sent it.

And from the solitude of our despair, we pick up the ashes of our desperate hearts and we bring it to Him. Blowing the ashes, scattering them across the desert to the furthest point where the sky and the sand meet…and He is there. In ALL the spaces and ALL the gaps between where you can see and where you are. In His eyes you watch the desert turn to garden. The blooms revealing colors you haven’t seen in a while and the fragrance of spring renewing your mind. The mountains that spring up from the flat, weary surface remind you that there IS a person who LIVES inside you. She has a purpose. He has a plan. She has a broken heart. He repairs it, one ash at a time. He promises that weeping endures for the night, but joy does come in the morning. He promises renewal. He promises endurance in Him. He promises a new song for her growing broken heart. He only asks her to Trust.

12 You will go out in joy
and be led forth in peace;
the mountains and hills
will burst into song before you,
and all the trees of the field
will clap their hands.
13 Instead of the thorn-bush will grow the juniper,
and instead of briers the myrtle will grow.
This will be for the Lord’s renown,
for an everlasting sign,
that will endure forever."


Sunday, December 16, 2012

As a Nation, As a Mom...

As a nation, we grieve.

As a nation, we mourn.

As a nation, we band together and pray.

As a nation, we weep.

As a nation, we are speechless.

As a nation, we cannot fathom.

As a nation, we have no answers.

As a nation, we lament.

As a Mom...I do all these things and more.

As a Mom, I push impatience aside and remember the Mom who would hear a lifetime of whining for one more I love you.

As a Mom, I search for signs of upset and fear on my own babies faces because they are right in front of me and I am afriad they can see my heart.

As a Mom, I second guess my decision to be where I am and have what I have because I wonder if the risk will outweigh the benefit.

As a Mom, I knit my heart with other Moms - and while my sense of loss pales in comparison to theirs, this community of mothers feels each loss in their core.

As a Mom, my compassion alternates between tears of anger and tears of joy that these special children each were a gift to this world, and that gift is everlasting.

As a Mom, I look to my faith to help me understand. My heart says - if I grieve this much, how much MORE does He grieve this loss? My heart says - "Do not be afraid, I am with You."... My heart says - just be still and know that He is God...

As a Mom, I know that one thing is certain. That my God sits on His throne and He is sovereign above all. He loves. He creates. He gives and He takes away. He is our safety, our refuge, and bottles all our tears. As a Mom, I pray that the Mom's whose arms are empty tonight can rest in this truth.

As a nation, we stand - under God, indivisible, with liberty and justice for all.

Join me in prayer for the hurting families. It does not matter what your religion is, how active you are, your past, your present..what matters is that we can join together. Jesus says that when two or more are gathered in His name, we will hear from heaven. Let the families affected by this tragedy hear from heaven. Please join  me in the shout.