HA! As I was sitting here, thinking about crafting this post, I was struck with the title. It made me laugh right out loud. Forgive me for being boastful, but I LOVE IT when the little brain I have is able to produce something clever. The title here makes PERFECT sense - and you'll see why if you continue to read.
Whether you know this from reading my blog or from knowing me in real life, I have spent the last 6 or so weeks fasting Facebook. In addition to fasting it, I have been doing a '40 Days in the Word' challenge at church. It is an AWESOME program about different study methods that you can use while reading the bible. It's not just all about reading and letting the Holy Spirit guide you (although that works!), it's about carving time and space in your day and your heart to sit and meditate and pull apart the wisdom and beauty that you find there. As Pastor Dave says, this book is the ONLY book that you can ask the author questions as you're reading it and can also get answers :)
So - as a result of this 'challenge,' I have been in the word more. There were some suggested readings for our 'homework' but being the classic over-achiever, I always wanted to read more. I actually CRAVED reading more. When I learn something new, I want to keep doing it over and over and over until it becomes boring - and then I want to find something else to do over and over and over ... I'm sure you catch my drift.
Well.
In the past 6 weeks or so, I have been blown away by a new found understanding I have about Jesus. BLOWN. AWAY. There is a song that plays on the radio that says "My God is not dead, He is surely alive!" and every time I heard it (before), I would think that yes, yes He is alive in my heart ... but I never GOT it. Oh friends, I've GOT it now and I'm holding tight.
Throughout the readings we've had to do, I've spent a LOT of time with Jesus. With His bolded, red words telling me parables and truths that most of the time require me to think VERY hard; yet at other times cause my spirit to soar with the hope I find there. What I have never, ever, EVER realized, is just how emotional Jesus was. He is SO much more emotional than I ever saw before.
Go with me. In my mind, God is love (1 John 4:8), and Jesus is part of the trinity that IS God and the Holy Spirit and Jesus all in one. Three in one. Three dimensions of the same being (hence the blog post title!!! HA!) YET each serving a purpose YET each existing because the other ones do YET encompassing ALL power and ALL glory and ALL mercy. I could go on and on and on. But the point of this is, that in my mind, Jesus was ALWAYS love. When I think of Him, that is what I see. Love. And while I know He is MORE than that, I never really saw it.. until my time in the word.
Jesus was MUCH more emotional and complex than I thought. What started me off on this was when I was in Matthew 21:12 where Jesus clears the temple. He "drove out all who were buying and selling there. He overturned tables ... " Clearly, he gets angry - or perhaps anger is a strong word for that emotion - maybe frustrated? He OVERTURNED tables! He drove people out (which I'm sure he didn't do by asking politely and smiling). This king sent to earth to save ME, was acting... well... human? Go to this scripture. Read it. Mediate on it. This is Jesus in his MOST human form. Dealing with the emotion that so many of us have to battle on a daily basis.
Another thing I found was that Jesus grieved. Another VERY strong human emotion. When He was in the garden of Gethsemane, He said (Matthew 26:37-39) "37 He took Peter and the two sons of Zebedee along with him, and he began to be sorrowful and troubled. 38 Then he said to them, “My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death. Stay here and keep watch with me.” Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, may this cup be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will." Jesus knew the PROMISE of heaven. He KNEW it because all things He could see so could His Father God. He innately understood the HOPE of heaven - He knew the riches there. YET he STILL grieved? This was Jesus in his MOST human form. Desiring life, yet knowing that His life would save mine.
One of the best things I found was that Jesus was truly honorable. I spent some time in prayer over Matthew 26-27 this Easter season, (the death and resurrection) and Matthew 26:10-13 jumped out at me and screamed just HOW honorable Jesus was. Jesus says “Why are you bothering this woman? She has done a beautiful thing to me.The poor you will always have with you,but you will not always have me. When she poured this perfume on my body, she did it to prepare me for burial. Truly I tell you, wherever this gospel is preached throughout the world, what she has done will also be told, in memory of her.” Jesus wants to honor this woman (who is Lazarus' sister Mary) by using her example of worship to represent what is true, noble, and right. Jesus wants to honor her... I keep saying it and reading it and being blown away by it. If Jesus wants to honor her, how much MORE would he want to honor us? We should be at his feet. We should be doting on His word just as she had the privilege of doing to his flesh. We should be sitting with Him, worshipping Him, cleansing our hearts through Him... all the things she did. He chooses to honor her. We need to honor Him.
See friends, our God is ALIVE. When He was alive (in Jesus), He was human - and though he was (super)human, He was still able to live a fully righteous life FULL of trial and tribulation. What a responsibility He had. Imagine, shouldering the salvation of the world on your shoulders ... and having the help of 12 other men to get the word out before it was too late. Imagine, the weight of his human-ness bearing down hard against the Truth He knew was awaiting Him in heaven - despite KNOWING for SURE where He came from and where He was going, He STILL fought back panic and grieved. Just imagine...
I still stand in awe of His sacrifice, friends. I still stand in awe of the courage it took and the trust it took for Jesus to take the blame. I still stand in humbled adoration, covered by the blood...and my thoughts repeatedly sigh 'what can I do, Lord...what can I do that would EVER equate to Your contribution to my life.' And in the still of His presence, the peace He gives me answers my heart is seeking for.
Wednesday, April 11, 2012
Monday, March 12, 2012
A Beacon
In the middle of the spotted sleep I tend to get every night, I am often inspired. Random thoughts here, random thoughts there...but rarely am I ever driven to actually get up (at 2:30 a.m.) and write it down...Last night I was, but I didn't get up. As a result, I could not sleep a WINK because I was overwhelmed with a vision...and the feeling that I needed to write this out has not left me all day...so I'm heeding to the 'call' to get this on 'paper'... Follow me.
Here is what I remember:
It was night time - the pitch black kind. No stars in the sky. The wind was as relentless as my worry. I was waiting - watching - unsure for whom or what. I can't remember if it was raining or if what I felt was a spray from the stormy sea. There was a HUGE cliff to the left of me, it's jagged silhouette murderously cutting the waves; being sure to assert it's dominance over the fierceness of the ocean. I stood on wet sand - it was firm beneath my feet. The shells showed no mercy as the wind had her way with them. I was cold, and full of anticipation. I remember the angry smell of the ocean - turned inside out and upside down; as unsettled as my thoughts. I was completely alone. No car behind me. No people beside me. Alone.
Luckily enough, there was a lighthouse built on rock right in front of me. The stack of rocks that it was built on was high enough that not even the acerbic waves could reach it. I found myself concentrating in the dark to see if I could tell if the beacon was moving.
As though my thoughts themselves were pushing the light around in the lantern room, I felt assured that the beacon would find me soon - even though my impatience caused time to slow to a snails pace. I thought about pacing the short shoreline because I thought that perhaps if I moved, time would also...but I was firmly planted. I remember clasping my hands together and holding tight to the hope I knew was coming.
In the way that only 'dreams' can, the next part happened in slow-motion, fast-forward. The beacon light was getting ready to pass 1:00 when suddenly it started to move faster and faster like it had gained momentum because it was heading down hill. As it passed through the pitch black, I saw people. Some of the people were crowded together, others were individually placed, ALL of them I knew.
I remember being able to know each one by name - even the ones in the crowd. I saw people I love now, people I've loved before, and people who have left me and moved to the place where Love has been fully revealed to them. I felt SO comforted by this...I knew that even though it seemed I was alone all along, I truly wasn't. I had these people who were WITH me, who were and ARE a part of me, who have become a piece of the fabric that has stitched up my quilted heart. The flood of hope that this brought my soul was indescribable. To know that a little light could reveal a changeable truth.
When the beacon rounded the next corner, it stopped on me. My logical mind felt as though I had to shade my eyes because a light that can steer a ship into safe harbor would most certainly NOT be a light that my mortal eyes could see. But I was wrong. This light was beauty - it was all colors and none. It was a symphony with a resounding chorus, and a moment in the back of a church where a widow mourns in silence. It was my past, my present, and my future. As this light rested on me, I felt possibility, peace, and immeasurable gratitude.
When I 'awoke,' I remembered a scripture: Isaiah 42:6-7 " I, the LORD, have called you to demonstrate my righteousness. I will guard and support you, for I have given you to my people as the personal confirmation of my covenant with them. And you will be a light to guide all nations to me. You will open the eyes of the blind and free the captives from prison. You will release those who sit in dark dungeons." It dawned on me - this vision I had was a LITERAL interpretation of this scripture!!!
I stood in the spot I was placed. I stood in waiting. And my 'awake' self would have been scared to even be where I was in my 'vision,' but my unconscious self stood there, guarded and supported by the people who were there, but who were not revealed to me until I was ready to flee. These people - my friends and family - were a personal confirmation of love and support in a dark and anxious time. Then the light came...it came and it WAS the light that guides the nations --> the nation was the league of friends and family that were there. I know, I know...this all sounds crazy...and I wish that I were better at explaining this part... but I know that I know that I know that this came NOW for a reason...although I am unsure what the reason is at this very moment...
If you've read this far, you deserve a round of applause!!! Thank you ... and for my faithful friends (old and new!) and family, thank you for everything.
~Dina
Here is what I remember:
It was night time - the pitch black kind. No stars in the sky. The wind was as relentless as my worry. I was waiting - watching - unsure for whom or what. I can't remember if it was raining or if what I felt was a spray from the stormy sea. There was a HUGE cliff to the left of me, it's jagged silhouette murderously cutting the waves; being sure to assert it's dominance over the fierceness of the ocean. I stood on wet sand - it was firm beneath my feet. The shells showed no mercy as the wind had her way with them. I was cold, and full of anticipation. I remember the angry smell of the ocean - turned inside out and upside down; as unsettled as my thoughts. I was completely alone. No car behind me. No people beside me. Alone.
Luckily enough, there was a lighthouse built on rock right in front of me. The stack of rocks that it was built on was high enough that not even the acerbic waves could reach it. I found myself concentrating in the dark to see if I could tell if the beacon was moving.
As though my thoughts themselves were pushing the light around in the lantern room, I felt assured that the beacon would find me soon - even though my impatience caused time to slow to a snails pace. I thought about pacing the short shoreline because I thought that perhaps if I moved, time would also...but I was firmly planted. I remember clasping my hands together and holding tight to the hope I knew was coming.
In the way that only 'dreams' can, the next part happened in slow-motion, fast-forward. The beacon light was getting ready to pass 1:00 when suddenly it started to move faster and faster like it had gained momentum because it was heading down hill. As it passed through the pitch black, I saw people. Some of the people were crowded together, others were individually placed, ALL of them I knew.
I remember being able to know each one by name - even the ones in the crowd. I saw people I love now, people I've loved before, and people who have left me and moved to the place where Love has been fully revealed to them. I felt SO comforted by this...I knew that even though it seemed I was alone all along, I truly wasn't. I had these people who were WITH me, who were and ARE a part of me, who have become a piece of the fabric that has stitched up my quilted heart. The flood of hope that this brought my soul was indescribable. To know that a little light could reveal a changeable truth.
When the beacon rounded the next corner, it stopped on me. My logical mind felt as though I had to shade my eyes because a light that can steer a ship into safe harbor would most certainly NOT be a light that my mortal eyes could see. But I was wrong. This light was beauty - it was all colors and none. It was a symphony with a resounding chorus, and a moment in the back of a church where a widow mourns in silence. It was my past, my present, and my future. As this light rested on me, I felt possibility, peace, and immeasurable gratitude.
When I 'awoke,' I remembered a scripture: Isaiah 42:6-7 " I, the LORD, have called you to demonstrate my righteousness. I will guard and support you, for I have given you to my people as the personal confirmation of my covenant with them. And you will be a light to guide all nations to me. You will open the eyes of the blind and free the captives from prison. You will release those who sit in dark dungeons." It dawned on me - this vision I had was a LITERAL interpretation of this scripture!!!
I stood in the spot I was placed. I stood in waiting. And my 'awake' self would have been scared to even be where I was in my 'vision,' but my unconscious self stood there, guarded and supported by the people who were there, but who were not revealed to me until I was ready to flee. These people - my friends and family - were a personal confirmation of love and support in a dark and anxious time. Then the light came...it came and it WAS the light that guides the nations --> the nation was the league of friends and family that were there. I know, I know...this all sounds crazy...and I wish that I were better at explaining this part... but I know that I know that I know that this came NOW for a reason...although I am unsure what the reason is at this very moment...
If you've read this far, you deserve a round of applause!!! Thank you ... and for my faithful friends (old and new!) and family, thank you for everything.
~Dina
Wednesday, March 7, 2012
In Which I Call Myself Out. . . .#embarrassed
I've been thinking...
As a few of you may know, I am currently fasting Facebook...and I talk about it. Often. Truth be told, I miss it. Desperately. I want nothing more than to log in and see what everyone is doing. I feel like a little kid who is told to go to bed but REALLY wants to stay up because the ordinary can turn to extraordinary at any given second.
My original reason was to fast the FB because I wanted to prepare my heart for Easter. I figured I would use the 'extra' time I had to get in the word more, or pray more, or do 'good.' (And yes, if you're wondering, I just admitted that I spend THAT much time on FB that giving it up translates to extra time in my day...). Like most of my good intentions, I have failed. Epically (<-- is that even a word?)
This scripture keeps coming up, around, and through me...Matthew 6:16-18 16"When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show men they are fasting. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 17But when you fast, put oil on your head andwash your face, 18so that it will not be obvious
to men that you are fasting, but only to your Father, who is unseen; and your
Father, who sees what is done in secret, will reward you." Up. Around. Through. I knew about this scripture - have for a while. When I am fasting in other ways, I follow this - no one would ever know... but for some (dumb) reason, I have exempt myself from this for FB. Ewwww... Gone against the words of Jesus (this IS a gospel message...) for Facebook? What the HECK?
Ashamed and disgusted are probably the first two words that come to mind. Not only have I NOT spent any additional time in the word or prayer, but I have also presented myself as a hypocrite??!? Trust me when I tell you this is NOT a 'woe is me' post...but more its a post where myself is calling myself OUT on this whole thing...even though my 'self' is acutely aware.
So what is the point of fasting something when you are not fulfilling the INTENTION of the fast? What is the point? So in my case, spending more time playing games on my iPad OR blogging is ok, but FB is not? Isn't that just this for that?
Ashamed and disgusted...yet here I am, blogging away...
My Pastor is starting a course on Thursday night "40 days in the Word" and when I first found out about it, I was SUPEREXCITED!! I have been desperate for something like this - something structured and 'tutorial.' Not that I can't/don't know how to read my bible, but if you know me, you know this is RIGHT up my alley. In hindsight, the reason I am so excited about it is because by doing it and following it, I am actually DOING what I intended on doing in the first place during this sacred season...My prayer is that this 'study' will truly take over my lack-of-FB-made-up-for-via-iPad-games balderdash. So if I don't post much, know I am fulfilling my promise to 'get ready' for Easter - because if there is ANYONE and ANY time to get ready for, it is Him and now.
As a few of you may know, I am currently fasting Facebook...and I talk about it. Often. Truth be told, I miss it. Desperately. I want nothing more than to log in and see what everyone is doing. I feel like a little kid who is told to go to bed but REALLY wants to stay up because the ordinary can turn to extraordinary at any given second.
My original reason was to fast the FB because I wanted to prepare my heart for Easter. I figured I would use the 'extra' time I had to get in the word more, or pray more, or do 'good.' (And yes, if you're wondering, I just admitted that I spend THAT much time on FB that giving it up translates to extra time in my day...). Like most of my good intentions, I have failed. Epically (<-- is that even a word?)
This scripture keeps coming up, around, and through me...Matthew 6:16-18 16"When you fast, do not look somber as the hypocrites do, for they disfigure their faces to show men they are fasting. I tell you the truth, they have received their reward in full. 17But when you fast, put oil on your head and
Ashamed and disgusted are probably the first two words that come to mind. Not only have I NOT spent any additional time in the word or prayer, but I have also presented myself as a hypocrite??!? Trust me when I tell you this is NOT a 'woe is me' post...but more its a post where myself is calling myself OUT on this whole thing...even though my 'self' is acutely aware.
So what is the point of fasting something when you are not fulfilling the INTENTION of the fast? What is the point? So in my case, spending more time playing games on my iPad OR blogging is ok, but FB is not? Isn't that just this for that?
Ashamed and disgusted...yet here I am, blogging away...
My Pastor is starting a course on Thursday night "40 days in the Word" and when I first found out about it, I was SUPEREXCITED!! I have been desperate for something like this - something structured and 'tutorial.' Not that I can't/don't know how to read my bible, but if you know me, you know this is RIGHT up my alley. In hindsight, the reason I am so excited about it is because by doing it and following it, I am actually DOING what I intended on doing in the first place during this sacred season...My prayer is that this 'study' will truly take over my lack-of-FB-made-up-for-via-iPad-games balderdash. So if I don't post much, know I am fulfilling my promise to 'get ready' for Easter - because if there is ANYONE and ANY time to get ready for, it is Him and now.
Sunday, March 4, 2012
Words . . .
Sometimes they are just words. Words that make sound to fill the silence of the space between insignificant thoughts. Words that run into each other to try and cover up nervous butterflies. Words that have no meaning when linked together - like pink shine & thunderous (or do they ... ;) ) Words can sometimes JUST be words.
But words can sometimes JUST be MORE than words themselves. They can speak life, they can speak truth, they can speak hatred and spite. They can build up and empower...or they can break down and belittle. Words, my friends, are powerful in and of themselves. Words have the power to motivate...or destroy.
If I say to you "worthy" you MAY agree you are, or you may shake your head and quiet the whisper in your heart that says you're not. It may have filled you with hope or longing. It may have revealed a truth to you - to a part of you that has been camouflaged but ready to break free.
If I say to you "no" you MAY agree that was the right thing to say given the circumstances you are in. You may be upset I said it to you. You may feel relieved because I gave you permission to NOT do something you were hesitant about doing. Perhaps indifference is the response because my opinion doesn't matter anyway ...
In my life, words have been a very powerful thing. I write them. I say them. I wish I could take them back at times. I regret them. I love them. I appreciate them. I am grateful for them. I don't have them - and sometimes I do. Most often though, I think I take them for granted.
In conversation today, someone quoted something I said to them. Something, that at the time seemed appropriate - but irrelevant. In fact, I forgot I even said these words until they were brought back to the surface. In hindsight, I realize how powerful these words were. How they spoke truth in his life. How they encouraged him when he was in an incorrigible place. At the time, I didn't understand the power these specific words held. Now, I am beholden to their authenticity in a life changing moment.
My most favorite thing of all about words is the simple complexity that they hold. The simplest thing can cause a cascade of complex thoughts - each person having those thoughts explore different perspectives, reaching a different conclusion depending on the path their hearts took.
My prayer for you today is that you will always remember how powerful words can be. Remember that the intention behind the word is just as strong. Remember that some words are double-edged swords that can cause irreparable damage. Remember that most words spoken come from your heart - and they will reflect the attitude that resides there.
But words can sometimes JUST be MORE than words themselves. They can speak life, they can speak truth, they can speak hatred and spite. They can build up and empower...or they can break down and belittle. Words, my friends, are powerful in and of themselves. Words have the power to motivate...or destroy.
If I say to you "worthy" you MAY agree you are, or you may shake your head and quiet the whisper in your heart that says you're not. It may have filled you with hope or longing. It may have revealed a truth to you - to a part of you that has been camouflaged but ready to break free.
If I say to you "no" you MAY agree that was the right thing to say given the circumstances you are in. You may be upset I said it to you. You may feel relieved because I gave you permission to NOT do something you were hesitant about doing. Perhaps indifference is the response because my opinion doesn't matter anyway ...
In my life, words have been a very powerful thing. I write them. I say them. I wish I could take them back at times. I regret them. I love them. I appreciate them. I am grateful for them. I don't have them - and sometimes I do. Most often though, I think I take them for granted.
In conversation today, someone quoted something I said to them. Something, that at the time seemed appropriate - but irrelevant. In fact, I forgot I even said these words until they were brought back to the surface. In hindsight, I realize how powerful these words were. How they spoke truth in his life. How they encouraged him when he was in an incorrigible place. At the time, I didn't understand the power these specific words held. Now, I am beholden to their authenticity in a life changing moment.
My most favorite thing of all about words is the simple complexity that they hold. The simplest thing can cause a cascade of complex thoughts - each person having those thoughts explore different perspectives, reaching a different conclusion depending on the path their hearts took.
My prayer for you today is that you will always remember how powerful words can be. Remember that the intention behind the word is just as strong. Remember that some words are double-edged swords that can cause irreparable damage. Remember that most words spoken come from your heart - and they will reflect the attitude that resides there.
"For the word of God is living and active. Sharper than any double-edged sword,
it penetrates even to dividing soul and spirit, joints and marrow; it judges the
thoughts and attitudes of the heart." Hebrews 4:12
Wednesday, February 29, 2012
It Is You...
Hi friends...Out of anything I've ever posted, this is giving me the most hesitation... Not that a lot of you read my blog (by ANY stretch!) but this seems to be the most personal thing I've ever posted on here. Funny thing is, I've posted a LOT of personal things!!
I recently had a bunch of 'writing' bubble up from a secret place that my heart sought out and found...and I think they're meant to be songs. I'm not entirely sure...but there seems to be a faint, haunting melody that comes along with each of them. I actually have a few times this has happened recently...weird.
The one that I have posted below was inspired the other night after I read through Psalm 57... The Psalm is about His faithfulness, help and love in times of trouble. So... before I chicken out, here it is!!!!
It is You
Verse 1:
My stirring soul awakens the dawn,
Quiet thoughts bustle and then they're gone;
Replaced by music my heart can dwell on,
It is You.
Chorus:
Your hands, Your heart, Your sacrifice
You, who paid the highest price
To rescue me - the least of these -
I give you my life
Verse 2:
My heart is steadfast, I rejoice in your name,
Humbled, at your feet - it is You I proclaim
Be exalted, O God, above all the earth
Only You remain the same!
Bridge:
One hand to guide me, the other to hold;
One hand to catch me when all else unfolds;
One hand to rest my weary soul...Safe in the arms of my Savior
Chorus 2/Ending:
My hands, my heart, my sacrifice;
For You, no matter what the price,
You rescued me - brought me to my knees,
I promised you my life...
Yes, Lord...I promise you my life.
I recently had a bunch of 'writing' bubble up from a secret place that my heart sought out and found...and I think they're meant to be songs. I'm not entirely sure...but there seems to be a faint, haunting melody that comes along with each of them. I actually have a few times this has happened recently...weird.
The one that I have posted below was inspired the other night after I read through Psalm 57... The Psalm is about His faithfulness, help and love in times of trouble. So... before I chicken out, here it is!!!!
It is You
Verse 1:
My stirring soul awakens the dawn,
Quiet thoughts bustle and then they're gone;
Replaced by music my heart can dwell on,
It is You.
Chorus:
Your hands, Your heart, Your sacrifice
You, who paid the highest price
To rescue me - the least of these -
I give you my life
Verse 2:
My heart is steadfast, I rejoice in your name,
Humbled, at your feet - it is You I proclaim
Be exalted, O God, above all the earth
Only You remain the same!
Bridge:
One hand to guide me, the other to hold;
One hand to catch me when all else unfolds;
One hand to rest my weary soul...Safe in the arms of my Savior
Chorus 2/Ending:
My hands, my heart, my sacrifice;
For You, no matter what the price,
You rescued me - brought me to my knees,
I promised you my life...
Yes, Lord...I promise you my life.
Monday, February 27, 2012
I'll Throw the Rope.. You Catch
I am convinced that friendships start by someone throwing a rope...and the other
person deciding to catch. But it doesn't end there. Friendships - of the
strongest kind - are actually a constant catch and release...each time this
happens, the rope gets thicker, but coincidentally, lighter...such is the beauty
of friendship.
I have a friend. Well, I'm blessed with a few... but I have this one particular friend who, well, let's just say that her and I share the better pieces of our hearts. I am her and she is me and we, together, are a perfect reflection of the best parts of ourselves. This is my rope to her. I hope I've thrown it far enough for her to catch...
To my friend...
I remember when you threw the rope to me. I played it cool, but I caught it. Secretly gleeful and holding as tight a I could without you noticing. It seemed from the start our friendship was written in the books of time as lasting forever. . . it seemed that there never was a moment that we didn't know each other. As a matter of fact, time is FOR us in our friendship - I just thought of this. Time has given us the gift of timelessness.
As the years went by, we each sat in our rowboats tossing the rope back and forth - though in reflection, it seems that you tossed a LOT more than you caught. My wild heart shouted secrets to yours and your gentle kindess coralled my spirit and helped point it Home.
When asked now how I ended up where I am, your name is quick to come up...I use words like 'rock,' 'hope when I was hopeless, rest when I was restless,' 'understands the words in my heart when they can only come out as tears.' And these are just SOME - I could go on and on. So, friend, I know that I know that I know that YOU know all these things...but I wanted to remind you. Because I'm throwing the rope. You catch.
I always had the questions. You always had the answers.. and they usually went like this "God says this...let's pray about that...you can find the answers in this book of our bible..." Your constant shepherding, your compassionate heart, and most of all your steadfast faith were and are an inspiration.
But it seems that things have changed a bit. The armor was off so the arrows were able to hit the soft spots in your heart. Each step was weighted with the burdens you carry. And while 'running on fumes' lasted a while, the peace in your heart is now pretty much empty..but let the peace of God rule in your heart. You say you know what you need to do - and I believe you. I believe IN you with all of my heart. BUT what I want you to do is ACT on it.
If I look with my wide-view lens ... you know, the one that God lets me borrow every once in a while? ... I can see that this will unfold according to the way that will entirely glorify Him. And you know - cause you tell me all the time - that how He delivers is not necessarily in the way that we expect or want, but it is ALWAYS in the way we need. And isn't hindsight ALWAYS 20/20? Press on, friend. Fight the GOOD fight. Have patience that the burdens you shoulder can be lessed through grace with a dash of prayer for good measure. Even though the pathways may seem crooked, and the signs may be unclear, trust that He put you on the road you are on because the final destination is MUCH better than you could imagine. Do not carry fear in your heart about the journey - instead, carry hope.
And as Jesus is carrying you right this very moment, I pray you know that so am I. I storm the gates of heaven for your every need. I shout louder than the praise of the angels so that God Himself, in His throneroom, hears my pleas on your behalf. And though I may join those same angles in a resounding chorus of "holy holy holy is the Lord God Almighty!" I am sure to petition the needs and prayers in my heart as well.
I threw the rope, friend. I know you caught it. My prayer is that you are able to pull it in, pull it tight and feel the love that I soaked in every fiber. 'Cause it's there. I am beyond grateful to be in the place I am - the place you helped me get - because now I have the opportunity to do for you what you've done for me...and while I doubt my ability to do it as well as you have, I know that my heart sings of the hope that you may not be able to see yet...But I do.
Love and light, dear friend.
Dina
I have a friend. Well, I'm blessed with a few... but I have this one particular friend who, well, let's just say that her and I share the better pieces of our hearts. I am her and she is me and we, together, are a perfect reflection of the best parts of ourselves. This is my rope to her. I hope I've thrown it far enough for her to catch...
To my friend...
I remember when you threw the rope to me. I played it cool, but I caught it. Secretly gleeful and holding as tight a I could without you noticing. It seemed from the start our friendship was written in the books of time as lasting forever. . . it seemed that there never was a moment that we didn't know each other. As a matter of fact, time is FOR us in our friendship - I just thought of this. Time has given us the gift of timelessness.
As the years went by, we each sat in our rowboats tossing the rope back and forth - though in reflection, it seems that you tossed a LOT more than you caught. My wild heart shouted secrets to yours and your gentle kindess coralled my spirit and helped point it Home.
When asked now how I ended up where I am, your name is quick to come up...I use words like 'rock,' 'hope when I was hopeless, rest when I was restless,' 'understands the words in my heart when they can only come out as tears.' And these are just SOME - I could go on and on. So, friend, I know that I know that I know that YOU know all these things...but I wanted to remind you. Because I'm throwing the rope. You catch.
I always had the questions. You always had the answers.. and they usually went like this "God says this...let's pray about that...you can find the answers in this book of our bible..." Your constant shepherding, your compassionate heart, and most of all your steadfast faith were and are an inspiration.
But it seems that things have changed a bit. The armor was off so the arrows were able to hit the soft spots in your heart. Each step was weighted with the burdens you carry. And while 'running on fumes' lasted a while, the peace in your heart is now pretty much empty..but let the peace of God rule in your heart. You say you know what you need to do - and I believe you. I believe IN you with all of my heart. BUT what I want you to do is ACT on it.
If I look with my wide-view lens ... you know, the one that God lets me borrow every once in a while? ... I can see that this will unfold according to the way that will entirely glorify Him. And you know - cause you tell me all the time - that how He delivers is not necessarily in the way that we expect or want, but it is ALWAYS in the way we need. And isn't hindsight ALWAYS 20/20? Press on, friend. Fight the GOOD fight. Have patience that the burdens you shoulder can be lessed through grace with a dash of prayer for good measure. Even though the pathways may seem crooked, and the signs may be unclear, trust that He put you on the road you are on because the final destination is MUCH better than you could imagine. Do not carry fear in your heart about the journey - instead, carry hope.
And as Jesus is carrying you right this very moment, I pray you know that so am I. I storm the gates of heaven for your every need. I shout louder than the praise of the angels so that God Himself, in His throneroom, hears my pleas on your behalf. And though I may join those same angles in a resounding chorus of "holy holy holy is the Lord God Almighty!" I am sure to petition the needs and prayers in my heart as well.
I threw the rope, friend. I know you caught it. My prayer is that you are able to pull it in, pull it tight and feel the love that I soaked in every fiber. 'Cause it's there. I am beyond grateful to be in the place I am - the place you helped me get - because now I have the opportunity to do for you what you've done for me...and while I doubt my ability to do it as well as you have, I know that my heart sings of the hope that you may not be able to see yet...But I do.
Love and light, dear friend.
Dina
Thursday, February 23, 2012
Just Below the Surface
Hi friends..
Life is a circus as of late - lots of flaming pins being juggled in the air at the same .. I'm currently taking bets which one will fall first. The heaviest one you say? Well you must be right... :)
I observed something recently that made me think 'I need to blog this' ... and I'm not even sure what to to say/think about it, but I figure that it's worth making sense of in writing.
The girls planted seedlings at church a few weeks ago. Some forget-me-nots and a strawberry plant. They had a grand old time painting their clay pots and wrapping them up to give as Valentine's presents to us. As it typically goes with ANY living thing that requires care, we have now inherited these small plants :)
As I was watering them the other day, I noticed something that perhaps I hadn't before. One of them - my oldest's - watered nicely. The soil drank down the cool stream of water and seemed to breathe a sigh of relief when it was full. The other one was much, much different.
As I poured the water, it immediately began to overflow - not because it was already watered, but because it was SO SO dry and the soil wasn't packed tight enough. The water I was pouring actually caused the soil to shift and float .. and then the water actually created a bubble on the top - as though I had poured it on the counter top. What did this mean? So I, who LOATHES getting my hands dirty, put the water down and tried to pack down the soil. It was so far beyond repair that it just caused WAY more of a mess - dry soil in the sink, tidbits of earth stuck to my fingers, water with swirls of grime racing across the table...what a mess.
So being who I am, I instantly thought about this from a metaphorical point of view. From the surface, both of these pots looked similar. Their size was the same. They appeared to be even with the amount of soil there was. Even though the painting and name on the outside of the pots were different, the fact that paint was there in the first place is 'same' enough. They came from the same seedling packet. From the same store. They were made in the same place - pretty much at the same time.
BUT the truth? The truth is that under what appeared to be the same, they weren't. One was made to endure the pressure of water. The other was not. One soaked up the life-giving liquid and seemed to sigh with contentment. The other pushed away this life-giving liquid and required intervention to be put back together.
So what did I ultimately do? Normally, I would have just thrown it out essentially considered the 'mess' not worth the investment to make it right (read: dirty hands and a few minutes of time). But not this time. This time, I carefully and deliberately packed and repacked the soil. I made sure that it was watered to contentment and the outside of the pot was cleaned.
SO what did this teach me? Many things, surprisingly. It taught me that a little investment goes a long, long way - and can even be 'life-giving.' If that seedling does in fact grow in that pot, I know that it was my effort that encouraged that. This situation also taught me that what appears to be the same on the outside is definitely NOT on the inside. . .
Think about this the next time you see two successful business women walking together into a beautiful building, or maybe the next time you see two new Moms walking their babies in strollers to get off the extra few pounds. Two similarly packaged people doing the same thing. Perhaps one would flourish with watering...perhaps the other would break with watering - but always know that you can make the conscious decision to help them pack down the soil and withstand the tension from the steady stream.
Life is a circus as of late - lots of flaming pins being juggled in the air at the same .. I'm currently taking bets which one will fall first. The heaviest one you say? Well you must be right... :)
I observed something recently that made me think 'I need to blog this' ... and I'm not even sure what to to say/think about it, but I figure that it's worth making sense of in writing.
The girls planted seedlings at church a few weeks ago. Some forget-me-nots and a strawberry plant. They had a grand old time painting their clay pots and wrapping them up to give as Valentine's presents to us. As it typically goes with ANY living thing that requires care, we have now inherited these small plants :)
As I was watering them the other day, I noticed something that perhaps I hadn't before. One of them - my oldest's - watered nicely. The soil drank down the cool stream of water and seemed to breathe a sigh of relief when it was full. The other one was much, much different.
As I poured the water, it immediately began to overflow - not because it was already watered, but because it was SO SO dry and the soil wasn't packed tight enough. The water I was pouring actually caused the soil to shift and float .. and then the water actually created a bubble on the top - as though I had poured it on the counter top. What did this mean? So I, who LOATHES getting my hands dirty, put the water down and tried to pack down the soil. It was so far beyond repair that it just caused WAY more of a mess - dry soil in the sink, tidbits of earth stuck to my fingers, water with swirls of grime racing across the table...what a mess.
So being who I am, I instantly thought about this from a metaphorical point of view. From the surface, both of these pots looked similar. Their size was the same. They appeared to be even with the amount of soil there was. Even though the painting and name on the outside of the pots were different, the fact that paint was there in the first place is 'same' enough. They came from the same seedling packet. From the same store. They were made in the same place - pretty much at the same time.
BUT the truth? The truth is that under what appeared to be the same, they weren't. One was made to endure the pressure of water. The other was not. One soaked up the life-giving liquid and seemed to sigh with contentment. The other pushed away this life-giving liquid and required intervention to be put back together.
So what did I ultimately do? Normally, I would have just thrown it out essentially considered the 'mess' not worth the investment to make it right (read: dirty hands and a few minutes of time). But not this time. This time, I carefully and deliberately packed and repacked the soil. I made sure that it was watered to contentment and the outside of the pot was cleaned.
SO what did this teach me? Many things, surprisingly. It taught me that a little investment goes a long, long way - and can even be 'life-giving.' If that seedling does in fact grow in that pot, I know that it was my effort that encouraged that. This situation also taught me that what appears to be the same on the outside is definitely NOT on the inside. . .
Think about this the next time you see two successful business women walking together into a beautiful building, or maybe the next time you see two new Moms walking their babies in strollers to get off the extra few pounds. Two similarly packaged people doing the same thing. Perhaps one would flourish with watering...perhaps the other would break with watering - but always know that you can make the conscious decision to help them pack down the soil and withstand the tension from the steady stream.
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